Retrieved via the Wayback Machine. Originally posted by Dilip D’souza

Some things get me peeved. My 6.5-year-old son and I go to the screening of My Fair Lady at the Cama Institute, Sunday evening. Even though we get there 15 minutes before the start, the hall is full. Wandering around, I finally find a seat for him at one end of a row. Nothing else except some seats along the side wall, so I sit on the chair there closest to him.

Many more people stream in after us, also searching for seats. About half an hour into the film, a young mother wanders in, strolls about searching for a while, then scurries over (yes, rather bandicoot-like) to my son and worms herself onto his seat. First, she squashes him to one side, then she actually lifts him up and puts him on her lap. I’m hard-pressed to believe I’m seeing this. I lean over and say, that’s my son, I’m not happy with what you did, can you please leave him alone? She motions pleadingly to me.

I can’t make a scene here and now, so I sit back, fuming.

He sits on her lap, but I can tell he is uncomfortable because of the angle of her legs. He keeps sliding off and has to hold on to the seat in front to prevent that. Finally he stands. I call to him to come sit on my lap, whereupon the lady’s son runs over and occupies her sliding lap.

Why is it OK to do this to a kid? Would the lady have thought it acceptable if she had been sitting on the chair and a large man came over and wormed himself into it?

But apart from that: how many more loved, more familiar Western films are there than My Fair Lady? The delicious insults Higgins throws about, Eliza’s outraged Cockney howls, the melody in every one of those songs . no wonder several in the audience mouthed along as Eliza sang. Lots of chocolate for me to eat/Lots of coal making lots of ‘eat/Warm face, warm hands, warm feet/AAAAh-Wooo-dn’t it be loverly?

Ohhhh yes.